Inaugural Ramblings

Greetings to you, bored reader, for you have found my new blog. I say "new" because I used to blog quite frequently up until a few short years ago. However, busyness and church politics (not HDBC politics if any of you High Desert people are reading) forced me to take an extended leave. Ceasing to blog actually took a bit of a toll on me as it I love to dialogue on topics (especially those of a theological/metaphysical nature) and it was cheap therapy for me. I've tried to start up again a few times but I never really got back into the groove of it. However, I'm hoping to give it my best shot this time around...

Since most people who would be reading this blog know me pretty well, I will skip a formal introduction and long life story. As I go along I will probably end up telling you way too much about myself as it is and end up scaring you away.

As for my life right now, I am finding myself in an interesting transition period. I have spent the past 6+ years of my life in vocational youth ministry. While it has had its ups and downs, it has been a ride that has brought me much joy. I still love every one of my "kids" and pray and hope for Christ to reign in their life. However, as of yesterday, I find myself now (at the ripe-old age of 25) formally retired from student ministry. I still love and respect the profession/ministry, but I find myself lacking in the skill-sets to succeed as God has given me other desires that have led me to take steps to obey Him.

So now I am currently sitting in a mostly empty house. My beautiful bride, Shannon, is currently asleep on an air mattress where our bed used to be and my 10 month old son, Owen Ray, is taking up temporary residence in a pack n' play in place of his crib. In two days I will be leaving these two focal points of my life to be a camp pastor for M-Fuge camps at the University of Mobile in Alabama.

Transition like this rarely comes without a flurry of confused emotions. I just finished up pouring into a youth group for the past 26 months and growing to deeply love and care for the youth and the church as a whole. It has not been the smoothest ride at times, but I leave with both a full and heavy heart. There are so many people who have been instrumental in keeping me sane and in check for the past two years and while I feel blessed to have known them, it is so hard to step away. I haven't had a chance to fully grieve this loss yet, but I feel it coming soon. Couple that with the fact that I have leave my family for the summer and you have a nice recipe for a nervous breakdown, but God has really been pushing me to trust Him lately and that seems like a pretty smart thing to do...

Along with these bittersweet feelings come a brisk sense of anticipation. While I have found myself in some pretty eclectic situations in ministry (everything from leading MUSIC (yikes) for VBS to speaking in front of hundreds of people to teaching young kids in India), I find myself stepping into a new venture as a camp pastor. For six weeks I will get a chance to share the Gospel and challenge several hundred kids while serving on a team with about twenty other people. This is such a scary and exhilarating opportunity for me and I really cannot believe how quickly God has opened this door for me. On top of this, God is opening up a path for us to move to Fort Worth so I can attend SWBTS and become a covenant member at my all-time favorite podcast church, The Village.

(Note: I have to start condensing things now because I'm writing too much for this to be my first into post).

Anyway, this is an incredibly amazing and frightening time for me and I cannot wait to get started. My heart still aches from current losses, but I look ahead to a fresh start. Lamentations 3:21-24 come to mind: "Yet this I call to mind, and therefore have hope: Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. I say to myself, 'The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him."

Anyway, I need to wrap up this initial post so here are a few final points of what to expect:

1) I am pretty self-deprecating and I love that I am that way (wrap your mind around that one :)
2) I try to keep things light when talking about heavy subjects. Hopefully this will be by far the most boring post I will write.
3) I love dialogue so feel free to subscribe and comment away.
4) If you are interested in reading my old blogs, they can be found at www.xanga.com/muddsmith (However, I've hopefully done a lot of growing up since then).

With all that said, I am finally going to head to bed. I love you all so very much...