I am keeping this short because it is rather late and I am in desperate need of sleep tonight. However, I did want to jot down a few thoughts before tomorrow started and they were gone forever.
I am over halfway done with week 2 here at M-Fuge and so far this week has been a cakewalk compared to the first week. Everything is starting to feel familiar and you get the sense that you can do what you are doing on autopilot... and that can be either a blessing or a curse...
Tonight was strange for me because for some reason or another I was a bit nervous when it came to speaking. Normally I am not nervous to go out and teach and if I am then it is normally just some light "butterflies" that go away quickly. However, for some reason tonight I was pretty petrified backstage.
I have this prayer that I frequently turn to when I am about to go out that the basic gist of it is that I desire for God to be seen and speak and not me. Normally this helps me to relax but tonight it just wasn't doing it. I stepped out on stage just not feeling adequate or strong enough.
However, as I have learned time and time again, God is strong enough. We tore right into 1 Kings 18 and God moved in a way that several students were broken and praying with their youth groups even after time for dismissal. I have to say that I was truly humbled by the experience because I know that it was nothing on my own power. God gave me the words and His words always hit the intended target. I left encouraged knowing that it is God who is the One who moves our hearts and all I have to do is be faithful.
Which leads me to one final random thought... How are you supposed to respond to something saying that you did good (when it comes to preaching)? I always end up sheepishly saying thanks but I know that God is the one who allows me to do it at all. However, if I say, "Well, God deserves all the credit," then I come across as being false modest or super-spiritual. I just don't know how to react well... Any legit ideas would be much appreciated.
Well, I'm off to sleep now. I love you all so very much...
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Same Old Struggles (explained)...
Forgive me in advance for sounding like a crazy person. Today was our first full day of camp and I am rather sleep deprived/dehydrated/otherwise out of it. However, I've been meaning to write a blog describing the "same old struggles" moniker for a while and thought I would go ahead and do so.
The main concept comes from an old Caedmon's Call song called Thankful:
You know I ran across an old box of letters
While I was bagging up some clothes for Goodwill
But you know I had to laugh at the same old struggles
That plagued me then are plaguing me still
I know the road is long from the ground to glory
But a boy can hope he's getting some place
But you see, I'm running from the very clothes I'm wearing
And dressed like this I'm fit for the chase
This song has always stuck out to me for that opening stanza. When I look at my past compared to my present, I find that I still struggle with many of the same things that I used to struggle with. While God has brought victory in some areas, some tend to manifest again in some form or fashion as a new struggle. However, praise be to God for His mercy and grace...
As a (former) youth pastor, I think I bring a different perspective to being a camp pastor. I am more aware of what students are directly struggling with and how adept they are at hiding their struggles. The use camp as a way to try to secretly deal with very big issues and then wonder why nothing ever seems to stick.
Tonight I challenged the kids to break the mold and not follow a standard camp tradition of waiting until "decision night" (gag) to start getting emotional/spiritual. We had an invitation time where the kids simply stood up to signify that they wanted to let go of things so that they could follow God and it was amazing to me to watch God move. There was emotion, but it seemed genuine and many kids were moved. I hope that God will move in a way that when they are digging through old letters that their current struggle will be nothing like their former ones.
God really wowed me tonight and it is truly humbling to be our team's camp pastor. I honestly do not know what I did to deserve such a privilege. I pray that God continues to move this week and that these students will encounter Him and learn to trust in God and His promises.
I love you all so very much...
The main concept comes from an old Caedmon's Call song called Thankful:
You know I ran across an old box of letters
While I was bagging up some clothes for Goodwill
But you know I had to laugh at the same old struggles
That plagued me then are plaguing me still
I know the road is long from the ground to glory
But a boy can hope he's getting some place
But you see, I'm running from the very clothes I'm wearing
And dressed like this I'm fit for the chase
This song has always stuck out to me for that opening stanza. When I look at my past compared to my present, I find that I still struggle with many of the same things that I used to struggle with. While God has brought victory in some areas, some tend to manifest again in some form or fashion as a new struggle. However, praise be to God for His mercy and grace...
As a (former) youth pastor, I think I bring a different perspective to being a camp pastor. I am more aware of what students are directly struggling with and how adept they are at hiding their struggles. The use camp as a way to try to secretly deal with very big issues and then wonder why nothing ever seems to stick.
Tonight I challenged the kids to break the mold and not follow a standard camp tradition of waiting until "decision night" (gag) to start getting emotional/spiritual. We had an invitation time where the kids simply stood up to signify that they wanted to let go of things so that they could follow God and it was amazing to me to watch God move. There was emotion, but it seemed genuine and many kids were moved. I hope that God will move in a way that when they are digging through old letters that their current struggle will be nothing like their former ones.
God really wowed me tonight and it is truly humbling to be our team's camp pastor. I honestly do not know what I did to deserve such a privilege. I pray that God continues to move this week and that these students will encounter Him and learn to trust in God and His promises.
I love you all so very much...
Thursday, June 4, 2009
When the Rain Comes...
When the rain comes you blame it on the things that you have done
When the storm fades you know that rain must fall on everyone
Rest awhile, it'll be alright
No one loves you like I do
(Third Day - When the Rain Comes)
When the storm fades you know that rain must fall on everyone
Rest awhile, it'll be alright
No one loves you like I do
(Third Day - When the Rain Comes)
I love the rain. I really always have. My favorite is a gusting thunderstorm that just seems to bellow and speak of the power and glory of God. While it may sound strange, these times make me feel very close and satisfied with God.
However, I realize that to some people rain (and especially thunderstorms) do not sit with them in the same way. Rain is seen as a nuisance and saboteur of these times of joy and satisfaction, a natural enemy that comes with its own supply of solvent to wash away your happiness. That is why we have terms like "Don't rain on my parade" and why we draw singular storm clouds as following around the cursed characters in cartoons.
Jesus even chimes in on the subject in Matthew 5 when He states, "You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect."
In this passage Jesus is making it clear that both good and bad times fall on both the sons of God and the sons of perdition. We should expect nothing less as God unveils His plan. However, our tendency seems to be that we think that God is out to get us when the rain falls on us. Well, today, the rain fell in a mighty way.
I am going to make this short because I could easily drag it out and give every detail. For your own sanity, I will abbreviate. I got up earlier than normal this morning to have a quiet time before breakfast. Then, our caterers forgot to make us breakfast (no spicy gravy today... yikes). However, I got to have a really good sandwich that I enjoyed immensely. We then went to great ministry site called "Light of the Village" that is smack dab in the middle of some serious gang territory (with constant violence) and meet some really amazing kids. Then we headed out and got a chance to play some basketball (my first love). Sounds like a blessed and fantastic day.
However, while we were playing something happened. A young man named Lamar was playing some aggressive defense on me and did a great job of trying to block my shot... by accidentally poking me in the eye. I actually saw his fingers IN my eye... it was rough
Now I'll fast forward a bit... after several hours of denial, I ended up going to a doctor's office and then seeing an ophthalmologist where I was diagnosed with a corneal abrasion (cut). It is totally one of the more excruciating things I have ever had to deal with and was basically promised by the doctor that the next two days will be quite horrible (We start camp on Monday, by the way). I am actually writing this here blog while wearing me eye patch... arg...
Couple this with the fact that I came down sick a few days ago and I would normally start to have to complain. However, is it really worth it? Sure, today I got a pretty heavy dowsing of some spiritual rain. Perhaps someone who does not know Jesus got a heavy dose of sunshine. However, I get the relish and revel in the knowledge that God is constantly showering down His mercy and favor on me because I am a child of His.
So with that said, I will rest well here while wearing my eye patch, keeping my cough drops near, and praising the Maker of the heavens and earth while I watch this very real thunderstorm out my window. And it will all be alright because no one loves me like He does.
I love you all so very much...
However, I realize that to some people rain (and especially thunderstorms) do not sit with them in the same way. Rain is seen as a nuisance and saboteur of these times of joy and satisfaction, a natural enemy that comes with its own supply of solvent to wash away your happiness. That is why we have terms like "Don't rain on my parade" and why we draw singular storm clouds as following around the cursed characters in cartoons.
Jesus even chimes in on the subject in Matthew 5 when He states, "You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect."
In this passage Jesus is making it clear that both good and bad times fall on both the sons of God and the sons of perdition. We should expect nothing less as God unveils His plan. However, our tendency seems to be that we think that God is out to get us when the rain falls on us. Well, today, the rain fell in a mighty way.
I am going to make this short because I could easily drag it out and give every detail. For your own sanity, I will abbreviate. I got up earlier than normal this morning to have a quiet time before breakfast. Then, our caterers forgot to make us breakfast (no spicy gravy today... yikes). However, I got to have a really good sandwich that I enjoyed immensely. We then went to great ministry site called "Light of the Village" that is smack dab in the middle of some serious gang territory (with constant violence) and meet some really amazing kids. Then we headed out and got a chance to play some basketball (my first love). Sounds like a blessed and fantastic day.
However, while we were playing something happened. A young man named Lamar was playing some aggressive defense on me and did a great job of trying to block my shot... by accidentally poking me in the eye. I actually saw his fingers IN my eye... it was rough
Now I'll fast forward a bit... after several hours of denial, I ended up going to a doctor's office and then seeing an ophthalmologist where I was diagnosed with a corneal abrasion (cut). It is totally one of the more excruciating things I have ever had to deal with and was basically promised by the doctor that the next two days will be quite horrible (We start camp on Monday, by the way). I am actually writing this here blog while wearing me eye patch... arg...
Couple this with the fact that I came down sick a few days ago and I would normally start to have to complain. However, is it really worth it? Sure, today I got a pretty heavy dowsing of some spiritual rain. Perhaps someone who does not know Jesus got a heavy dose of sunshine. However, I get the relish and revel in the knowledge that God is constantly showering down His mercy and favor on me because I am a child of His.
So with that said, I will rest well here while wearing my eye patch, keeping my cough drops near, and praising the Maker of the heavens and earth while I watch this very real thunderstorm out my window. And it will all be alright because no one loves me like He does.
I love you all so very much...
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